1

The Cabin In The Woods

"Yo hotty!"

Who the heck still uses those words?

"Hey! You big ass slut!"

I clenched my fist and did my best not to slam this guy's face over some random table.

He's not calling for me, thank gosh, But he is still disrespecting a woman. A woman with great integrity and pride.

"Yo mama-!"

I looked behind me and was about to slam him, but suddenly stopped. I can say that I was shocked when I saw a girl with red hair, caked face, a coca-cola body, and bare clothes on. But it made me swallow my words when she strutted to the dude who called her those... compliments.

A woman with great integrity and pride...

She is going to punch his face. I'm sure of that. She has to.

Then she winked and bit her lower lip.

Screw it.

I sighed and continued waiting for my dear friend Andy. I tapped my shoes and waited patiently. Although, I am a very impatient person.

Very.

I heard this annoying girl singing and I want to strangle her. -but I can't sense it's Ariana Grande's voice in a random stereo.

Dammit.

Truly Madly Deeply I am foolishly, completely falling-

Startled, I took my phone from my back pocket and answered it.

Please, let it be him.

"Hello?"

"Hun! Darling!"

Sighing, I nodded. "Mom." I glanced at my watch. "Do you need anything? Don't worry, I'm still here in"

"I don't need anything, but uh, your daddy and I are going... somewhere." Then I heard a crash. "I left a note on the counter... We love you......beekeeper."

I sighed as she hanged up. I sent a text to Andy saying that he's slower than my dead grandma before grabbing my grocery bags and drove home.

~-~

When I arrived home, I dropped the keys on the living room's counter table and frowned when I didn't see mom's usual green sticky note.

Wait.... in what specific counter does she mean?

Oh damn.

I climbed upstairs and took a peek at my parent's room. I frowned a little bit when it was dark and silent. Oh right, they left. Stupid.

No note on the counter.

I walked to the bathroom and took a peek.

No note on the counter.

I entered my bedroom and took a peek.

No counter so, no note on the counter.

I went downstairs and was heading for the basement when I remembered that we don't have a basement.

Facepalm.

Damn, all this hard work is making me hungry. I walked into the kitchen and opened the refrigerator. Grabbing some pudding, I went to the counter and stopped when I saw the note.

Seems like someone decided to show up, ey?

~-~

Looking at the small vintage-looking house, I frowned a little bit.

Am I in the right place?

I took the letter my mom left on the kitchen counter and read it.

"Going somewhere darling. Be safe. Go to the woods and go to the small hotel we usually go to years ago. Show this to the receptionist. We love you, hun.

Mom.

÷% &÷= £! ~ 19114451819"

Yup. This is it.

I never knew why we always went to this old cabin or 'hotel' as they say. It's just a one-story house with 3 hotel rooms. And let me tell you, those "hotel rooms" are smaller than my bathroom. Okay, maybe a little bit bigger.

I entered the cabin, I mean, hotel carefully. Every step I took creates a loud creek, which made me think that this floor could and would give up any second now.

Blame the taco last night.

I went straight ahead and was not shocked when I saw an old lady in a bun, with crouching shoulders and silver glasses.

Let's just say that I was expecting her kind of a receptionist.

Smiling brightly, I stopped in front of her. "Good morning miss, I would like to"

"It's Mrs. and unfortunately yet, fortunately, the hotel is full for the night, the restaurant forgot to buy ingredients and there are rats in the janitor's room." She said it so fast that she didn't even bat an eye! "Please seek for other hotels nearby."

What a lovely lady.

Hold up, she said what now?

-She's a Mrs. ?!

-Some actual people went to this hotel?!

-What kind of restaurant forgets to buy their own ingredients that there is no stock in their fridge?!

-So what if there are rats in the janitor's room?

-AND THIS IS THE ONLY HOTEL HERE, SO THERE ARE NO HOTELS NEARBY.

Shaking off my thoughts, I smiled nicely at her. "I'm not going to stay here for the night though, but I-"

"Then leave." Her eyes went back to the book she was reading. "You're wasting my time."

I breathed through my nose to control my temper and showed her my mom's letter.

At first, she stared at my hands first and snorted, "Sorry darling, money cannot buy everything."

I breathed out loudly through my nose, again. "No, I mean, please take a look."

She glares at me before taking the letter off my fingers.

She opens it and reads it. Her eyes widen and immediately took the telephone beside her before dialing someone. Then, she started whispering an unknown language through it before slamming it down.

"Please, go to the elevator."

"There's an elevator?!" I immediately covered my mouth while my eyes widened that I actually said that out loud. "I mean, at what floor?"

"Just do what I say." She snapped before doing whatever she was doing earlier, typing furiously at her computer.

Oh sure then, I'll just go to that random elevator and visit every floor you have until I meet a person I'm not aware of meeting with. And the best receptionist award goes to....!

"Okay?" I said, not quite sure what I was about to do.

What floor?

I thought before pressing the circle button at the wall that looks like an elevator.

"Ding!"

I blinked a lot of times noticing that it looks pretty decent. It's actually made of metal.

This hotel IS weird.

I entered it and looked at the button options.

2 buttons.

Seeing an obviously one-story building with an elevator is shocking already, I'll be shocked if there's more.

I pressed the button and as its close, I noticed that the elevator's ceiling is made up of an apricot pillow-like material.

And when the doors finally closed, immediately, I felt my whole body being slammed at the cushioned ceiling.

WAIT, WHAT?!

"Ding!"

I groaned at the impact of the cushion in my head.

Wait, what?

I noticed that the floor is already the cushion and the ceiling is the metal thingy.

Did the elevator itself just do a backflip? Or was it... me?

"What the actual fudge is happening here?" I stood up and tried fixing my hair.

I squinted my eyes when I noticed that the elevator door hasn't opened yet.

WAIT FOR WHAT?!

I did my best to control my panics and my ramblings in my brain. After a second or so, I can control my breathing already and think properly.

Think Em, think!

I look at the elevator button and pressed the only button. There was a 'click' noise and immediately, the plain metal wall flipped and a numeric keypad replaced it.

What's up with this hotel and flipping stuffs? Is this even a hotel?

I look at the keypad weirdly before realizing something.

There were numbers on the letter! Maybe that would help me!

I took the letter from my pocket and typed the numbers.

"19114351819" After typing the numbers, I pressed the green button below and waited.

"EH." A red flash everyone stunned my eyes and immediately flipped me like what happened earlier.

WHAT THE ACTUAL FUDGE?

"Ding!"

"You're still here?" She asked.

"What the heck, just happened?" I said before trying to stand up.

"Did you type those numbers? Damn, I never thought that a Sanders could be so dumb."

I gawked at her insult for me before glaring at the letter, "I did."

"Did you type it properly?'

I opened my mouth to say yes but didn't say it since I might not have put it typed properly.

"Now go back there."

I nodded and pressed the button again. And as expected, when it closed, it flipped me, and I pressed the button again.

"19." I typed slowly while muttering the numbers out loud, "11.445.18.19"

I closed my eyes for the flash but sighed in relief when the doors opened.

But, instead of feeling alright, my blood from below went straight to my head, and felt like I should dig up my own grave.

There were people in a black suit, not tuxedos, but black fitting bodysuits. The huge floor was divided into sections, some people were practicing shooting a shotgun, throwing knives like darts on targets, people were practicing their combat skills, and a lot more. The only thing that is dividing them is the no doubt sound-proof and probably bullet-proof thick glass wall.

"Where am I?" I wondered out loud.

"Welcome to the Underground, darling." I jumped from shock and immediately turn to where the sound came from.

A guy with red hair, good-looking face features, and lean muscles -I can see it through the bodysuit- smiles at me.

As much as I would love to ask for his number, I frowned at him. "Don't darling me, asswipe."

His smile immediately turned into a snarl and glared at me, "Good, I can't continue the act. You disgust me."

The ass said what now?!

Ignoring his insult, I grab my mom's letter and showed him it, "According to the letter, my mom wanted me to give this to the receptionist and-"

"Do I look like a f*cking receptionist?"

"Are all people in this hotel or whatever this is, are blunt?!"

"We're an honest babe." He winked and turns around.

Earlier, he said that I disgust him, and now he's flirting with me?

I watch as he walks away, then suddenly he stopped. Turning around, he glared, "Follow me, idiot. Shay was right, you are dumb."

I immediately run behind him and did my best not to punch this ass. So the old hag earlier was Shay. Touché.

HAHAHA! GET IT? NO? Okay.

"Why are they here?" I asked in awe as we pass by different sections.

"To train, sherlock." He snapped.

I glared at the back of his head and gritted my teeth. "Why the 'fudge' are you pissed with me?"

"Why the 'fudge' are you annoying me?" He mocks me.

We continued walking straight ahead, we passed through this metal tunnel and a lot of sections.

"I can't believe that you're a Sanders." I heard him whispered.

"You know my name?" I asked, catching up beside him, "You know my family?"

"Who doesn't?" He looked at me with a glare.

Whoa, I never knew that I was famous-

"For the family part though, who doesn't? But about you? We're quite shocked that there IS you."

Ass.

"We're?" I quoted.

He stared back ahead, "The D.A.C"

"D.A.C?" I asked out loud.

He snorted, "As expected from the dumb child, of course, you don't know it."

I pursed my lips, "Just tell me about it."

He shrugged, "D.A.C stands for Deadly Assassins Corporation. The original name was supposed to be D.P.A.F.E.A.A or D.P.A.F.E.A squared."

Great, even algebra is in this topic?

"But the corporation changed it a year later. D.A.C is a corporation for deadly assassins. And the president of D.A.C is Denise Sanders."

I raised an eyebrow, "Never heard of him."

He rolls his eyes, "Your father."

"Wait, what?!" This is not making sense! "My father's name is HAROLD, Harold."

He chuckled at me, before making his face a poker face again. "His real name is Harold, but in this world, his name is Denise."

"In this world? Great, now we're in a different dimension!"

"No, dumb idiot. We're just different from other human beings since we know things that the FBI and NASA know. Plus, we are highly trained to be better than them."

"Wait, deadly assassins? Are you telling me that my...."

"That your....?"

"That my parents are assassins? Murderers? Criminals? Monsters?"

His eyes immediately went darker and looked straight ahead, "We kill people who are in debt of something. We're not technically killing angels, you know. And yes, they are."

Oh, so he killed someone already... -no doubt.

"Isn't it quite stupid for my family to keep their last name if your targets expect some Sanders to kill them?" I mean, if they're going to change their first name, why not change the last name too?

He smirks, "Our targets already are expecting that, that's why expect the unexpected." Then he went back on looking straight ahead.