<Josh>

　　I have a lot of questions in my mind since then. Until now it's still a big question to me. I never fall in love with a lady, I don't know. Do you think it's normal for man? Look! I'm not a gay, 100% sure. Maybe, I'm just waiting for the right lady for me. The lady whom I will love forever. The lady whom I will protect, I will take care of for the rest of my life.

　　I am sure, I'd never fall in love or just in denial? I don't know if what I felt before was just a puppy love or what. We are still young that time. Honestly, she is still on my mind. I'm still thinking about her. Is that mean, I'm in love with her that's why I can't let myself enter in a relationship? Is this the reason why I can't court other ladies? This is one of the questions that is really hard to answer because even me I don't understand myself.

　　I know I left her without notice, without even saying good bye. It's been years but her face is still clear on my mind. The way she smiles, the way she looks at me and the way she takes care of me are the memories that are still here in my heart. Sometimes, I'm wondering what will happen if I didn't leave her? Are we still together by this time? No one can tell what will happen.

　　I'm still hoping to see her because I can't forget her even years have passed. Am I in love with her or just in denial until now? I've been waiting to see her again for so long, until now she's not showing up. Did she look the same? Well, of course not. What if I accidentally met her somewhere else but I didn't recognize her? Is that mean, we are not meant for each other?

　　I can't move on. I really can't. I'm still confused until now. Every time I look at the only picture of her that I have, I feel pain. It's like something stabs my heart. It's killing me inside. Is she still thinking of me or she forgotten me already because of what I did to her?

　　Well, if we are destined to be together, fate will find its own way. We will meet each other again in the right time and in a right place if we are really meant for each other.

　　If I'm still in love with her, I hope it's not too late for this love. I will find her, I will. But if I will be given a chance to come back in the past, I will do the same thing. What I did wrong is, I didn't say good bye but that's for her own safety.

　　Sometimes, when I had sleepless night, I'm reminiscing our happy moments together while holding her picture. I still remember the day she told her parents that she wants a simple birthday celebration. On her 18th birthday, she requested them to invite me and family. Just her family and my family. That's what I love about her. She's a simple lady with a golden heart.

　　God knows that I came back to see her and explain everything why I left without notice but someone told me that they left. No one can tell where they moved.

　　But a year after, I received a news that she met an accident and her parents brought her in United States. After that, I never heard anything about her. I felt worried about her condition. But I can't do nothing about it. Now that I'm a detective, I will do everything to find her. I will search the world to find her.

　　Lately, I dreamed of a lady. She's gorgeous than her. She's making me crazy. I feel so confused now about my feelings because of this lady occupying my mind and trying to invade my heart. I know it was just a dream but it's kind of mysterious. I dreamed of her almost every day. It's weird right? Tell me, do you think I'm crazy if I fell in love with the lady in my dream?

　　Ugh! I'm going crazy. I'm going crazy. Josh! Josh! Josh! Stop thinking about this lady, she might not love you back. She's just a dream. Because of what I have experienced I decided to consult a doctor but I refused because the doctor might just laugh at me, he will surely think that I have mental illness. So, I decided to go in a fortune teller. All of the questions in my mind were answered magically.

　　Call me crazy man or whatever you want to call me but I’m hooked with what the fortune teller told me. I didn’t tell her about my dream or whom I dreamed of but everything was clearly discussed by the fortune teller. She knows about my past. She knows everything about me even my dream. She told me one thing, the lady in my dream and the lady in the past will have a clash to convince me to love them both. What made me shocked is, when the fortune teller told me that I love them both and I will not choice who between them I will marry because I will marry them both. I don’t know what she means with that, honestly, I still don’t get it.

　　Seriously, the first question which came into my mind is, “Am I that playboy to marry two beautiful ladies?” Second, “Is that really me?” Third, I reacted. Ugh! I’m going crazy because of what I found out. Whether it is true or not, I will still believe her because some people told me she’s really seeing the past and the future but not the present times.