Aya, a minute please?” A female’s voice pushed through the crowd’s hinted ushering. “Coming!” I shouted back politely as I shifted my weight from the recent deliveries I had barely made a dent despite hours of hard work.

“Are you okay ate Eden?” She seemed very unsettled, fidgeting with customer’s order.

Mrs. Eden Castro, my lady boss.

“ate” pronounces in two syllables is a Filipino honorific title used to call older females and siblings.

“Umm, I have a headache ... let’s swap” Her face wrinkled, showing obvious fatigue. I realised it was just the two of us working in the shop and she had been tending the till for hours.

“Has it been this busy for long?” My head tilted to her as my question came absentmindedly. “Yes!” Her irritated look coupled with her bulging eyes had me jolted from my feet. I quickly changed place with her, unequivocal she’d leave my former task for my later continuation.

The queue was forming a long line towards outside of the oriental shop my employers own. Had anyone not took it upon themselves to direct the queue outwards, there would not be enough space to move around. It was never this busy before and I didn’t recall anything special to warrant such high volume of shoppers all day?

Ramune Sodas and few bottles of Soju. ‘What a combination’. Yanking the two plastic carrier bags from its holder, I casually voiced the total “£62.31 please”.

“Contactless okay?” he inquired.

‘That’s actually better’ “of course!” I replied. Seconds later I was doubling the carrier bags and placing the receipt in with the purchased.

“Your items...” as I lifted my eyes and met his, the rest of my words lodged in my throat, momentarily paralysing me in place. I couldn’t tear my eyes off of him. My arms remained outreach for what seemed like eternity; one hand on the handle of the bag, the other supported the bottom.

‘No...no...no... you have to pull yourself together! You can’t! It can’t!’ Panic ensued me as I felt a strong force pulling me into some sort of temporal loop; people dancing with the booming sound of music, everyone letting themselves loose and enjoying what tonight was — celebration!

“Alanis, come on... hurry up! A girl gyrating in music smiled at me as she moved guiding me deeper into the crowd. “I’m trying” I whined , zigzagging from a crowd of bodies, not bothering to even look at their faces. ‘I’m never going to remember anyone here, even if they bump into me later’ I commented to myself silently. The place was so crowded, the music was blasting — my eardrums could burst at any given moment. “Ahh...” I winced, getting nearer Catalina, she was now dancing full on at the centre, which meant the music was louder, too. Standing at 5’9”, she was very tall for our kind but simply blended in with the people in here. I, on the other hand felt so tiny. My 5’3” height seemed irrelevant in comparison.

“Your scheming plot will NOT work with me” his piercing remark tore through me bringing me back to my senses. Well, the voice in me couldn’t help me but his remark – crude and sharp, surely did! Just like that I was back to reality.

“What?” Anger laced my voice as panic disappeared, still I calmed myself. I couldn’t act recklessly. I represented not just myself, but the very people that employed me no matter how short my stay with them, I should not let them lose face.

“I have no time for people like you!” His sharp eyes hinted irritation. “Your time best focus on serving your customers, than seducing them.” My blood drained from my face. How could this man be this ruthless? It wasn’t as if I flirted with him. I only froze, didn’t I? ‘Screw with losing face’ I was ready to give him a piece of my mind when my eyes drifted off of him and caught sight of my hand. ‘Oh no, I didn’t... when?’

“I’m sorry …" Jolting the words out of me as I made sense of the situation I inadvertently put myself in. ‘I held his hand? No wonder he said I was seducing him! I wished the earth could open up and swallowed me with it’. I felt so foolish.

He didn’t respond, instead continued to stare at me with contempt. I couldn’t let it go.

“You misunderstood me... and I have NO interest in you!” I uttered those words with determination, eyes scanning his, then I drew back my arms as I put down his shopping. It was quite weighty — ‘how did I hold it up for so long?’

“Not interested?” His words reverberated in my ears, drilling every letters as it penetrated my being. His probing had ignited a fear inside me again. The coward in me wanted to run away and hid somewhere dark, but I couldn’t. His grips on both my wrists were painfully strong, pinning my hands atop the counter. He had done that as I was withdrawing them. His eyes bore malice as though I challenged his sexuality and therefore could gobble me up for even contemplating what I said, let alone saying it. His face closed to mine — too close for comfort. Our lips were almost touching, earning mixed opinions from bystanders. Witnesses opinions were divided, but I didn’t care, rather I was thankful for the few that chose to be on my side. I was sure he did that to intimidate me, instead he saw something unexpected through our proximity. Whatever it was he had a puzzled look, then stared somewhat searching for something. My heartbeat raced a mile with his expression.

“I really am not. You just... reminded me of something — “

“ — something or someone?” His interruption was invasive yet it was his words that bore through me. ‘Something...? Someone...?’ Echoing in my ears over and over again.

“Where have you been?”

“In the toilet”

“What are you doing hiding?”

“I wasn’t hiding!”

“Then what took you so long?”

“There was a large crowd”

“How could there be?”

“Simple, it only takes another of you to make a crowd!”

She went at me guns blazing, determined to interrogate me, God only knew what for, I was thankful my last comment shut her up — but it was short lived.

“Cata, you are great... but you take so long each time you use the toilet! I could grow another head by the time you’re done, don’t you know?” That earned a smile from her. She had a smile that was so innocent, but I knew from knowing her she was opposite of that. “Well, I guess that’s kinda true” nudging me with her shoulder, we both laughed.

“Come with me!”

“Slow down, what’s the rush?”

“I need you to meet someone”

“Who do I remind you of?” His voice once again drew me back to reality. Great! This guy could work for me — he’d be a blessing and a curse. Pro: he could yank me out of dreamland every time it pulled me, con: he was one of those many reasons why I was screwed up in the first place. Not to mention his pay something I could never afford, I was sure.

“I’m really sorry for causing you inconvenience, I didn’t mean to trouble you at all” I stepped back forcing my arms to stretch as far as it allowed me to. I then bowed showing my sincerity. I was starting to believe maybe I could pull through this episode, but I was wrong.

“I need to speak with your boss” he stated as a matter of fact, hinting nothing.

‘Is he really going to hold this much grudge against me...? For something stupid?’ I feel myself drained of life as I answered him “I’ll lead you to my boss then, sir. Follow me please?”