Prologue

Webcams.

Webcams everywhere.

They were all connected to laptops that were facing me, showing me exactly what I looked like. Sat in the middle of a red dim lit room, tied to a chair, I pulled and yanked at the ropes in hopes of finding a way out of this nightmare that I was swimming in. I was drowning, the more I tried to get free of the ropes, the tighter they felt around me, suffocating me, swallowing me whole into this dark middle of nowhere with the endless eternity of misery that I couldn’t shake myself out of.

No one was here, not a person in sight, only me and the cameras, only me and the reflection of my trapped form, it was there to taunt me, it was there to remind me that I was trapped, trapped within the constant reminder of how doomed I was.

“Let me for!”

I screamed out, my voice cracking as my anxiety tormented my vocal chords, leaving me with a shaky breath and a half assed demand.

“Who the fuck are you?!”

I yelled again, hoping, wishing that whoever this sick person was, he would let me go, he would set me free, he would stop this before it got worse.

“Why are you doing this to me?”

I cried out, my tears straining against my eyes, they muttered their threats against my eyelids before they slipped free and stained my cheeks, dampening my skin, reminding me that I was still alive, something that could change very soon, something that wasn’t guaranteed.

“Please- please let me go.”

I was whispering now, it was no use, he wasn’t going to answer me… or so I thought, because as I looked up at the laptop screens, each of them had paused on my image as texts began to form on the screen, he was typing… why was he typing?

‘I didn’t go through the trouble of taking you in order to let you just go so easily.’

My skin crawled at the text written out for me on the screen, I could feel my entire body shaking as I looked all around the room for any sign of this man, I was afraid that he’d never reveal himself and I’d forever be trapped in this dark room, I was also afraid that he would reveal himself and things would get even worse than they already were. I was terrified.

‘You have sinned. I will cleanse you.’

Another text written on the screen, it disappeared quickly as the entire screen went black for a moment and once the screen was back on… my heart stalled in my chest, running my blood cold as I scanned what was before me.

I was live.

He was broadcasting me live on my website, sitting here restrained against the chair with black mascara running down my eyes, I was being broadcasted, he was taking pleasure in showing my followers what he had made of me… he was….

Breaking me.

Vienna-

Lingerie: check.

Heels: check

.

Lipstick: check.

Posing on my bed, I spread my legs as I slowly and seductively traced my fingertips up my legs, staring into the camera, I kept focus on pleasing my fans as they invaded the comments with filth.

I loved it.

I loved the attention, although, a part of me hated the fact that I was using my body to earn a living, it didn’t stop me from getting paid thousands and thousands for just being sexy.

I switched positions, getting on my hands and knees, I arched my back, lifting my ass in the air, I kept my head low but my eyes up at the camera that was putting every moment of this live for my viewers to see.

They loved it.

They loved giving me attention, they loved the view before them, they loved giving. They loved… me… or my body.

‘£100000 donation has been made by user: Unknown.’

My eyes scanned over the notification in chat as I looked over the amount of money that had just been donated to me. Butterflies doing backflips in my stomach, I shivered at the thought of someone liking me so much that they sent me so much money but the username ‘unknown’ didn’t sit so well with me.

Most if not all of my viewers would contact me, talk to me. Try to take me out on a date… or to their bedroom. Though I never met any of my fans in person, I kept everything strictly over the internet, I had enough of creeps harassing me and stalking me that I didn’t need it to become real life. Online was enough to have me contemplating my life decisions. But this user, this one specific viewer, he was a strange one. He paid for private webcam calls weekly, though he would never be on cam himself, he would always have a blank screen as I gave him a show.

He’d ask for specific things, to dance for him. To strip completely naked for him, although he knew that, that was something that was out of the question. I only did sexy lingerie cam calls, I never fully revealed my nudity to my viewers and I planned to keep it that way so I always declined his request. Often, he’d send me large amounts of money which would be accompanied by private messages that would start off quite demanding and intimidating to him lecturing me for what I was doing. He would scold me for showing my body off to millions of people on the internet. I’d blocked him multiple times but each time he offers me a large amount of money that I can’t refuse, joining my page with different accounts, he asks me not to block him and that he’ll pay me for it and he always does. It’s strange but I don’t think much of it.

In my line of work, I’ve had dozens and dozens of weirdos and creepy stalkers so I was used to this by now but eventually, they’d get bored and leave but this guy, he was persistent, he never gave up, never.

‘Private chat request by: Unknown.’

Of course. Of course he would be requesting a private chat but I was exhausted and quite done for the night so I declined his request before saying goodbye to my viewers and ending my live broadcast.

It was draining, to always have to please my fans, to always have to look my best and still get judged and harassment daily. It was exhausting not only dealing with crazy fans but hateful people who despised me for what I did as a job.

Everyone was always so quick to jump to conclusions, calling me a whore, a slut, saying I am worthless and have no self-respect but no one questions why I do what I do. They don’t even care to know the reason behind my choice of work.

Yes I love the attention, who doesn’t? Yes I love to be earning money just for dressing up hot, again, who doesn’t? But if I don’t do this, I’ll be on the streets, growing up with a deadbeat dad and a psychopathic mother, I didn’t have much of a good upbringing, I tried school, I did, I even tried college but then I was raped, I lost my virginity to a frat boy who thought drugging girls and assaulting them then videoing it was cool and something to boast about. After my rapist and his boys posted my video on the internet, it went viral and although a lot of people were angry and could clearly see that I was being sexually assaulted as I was technically unconscious, many others labelled me as a whore. I lost all my friends who accused me of lying about the assault just to get attention, they all assumed that I wanted to be drugged and raped and so, my mental health went down the drain, leaving me a complete mess.

Drugs, alcohol, sex. I did it all. All the time. Parties were a daily routine, I couldn’t stop it, I couldn’t stop myself from spiralling, I was getting worse and worse until one day, I overdosed and almost died and that’s when I knew, I couldn’t keep that up anymore, I knew that I had to stop and figure something out but due to my lack of studying, I failed my course and ended up losing my student accommodation.

I tried to get a job and I did manage to get one, I became a waitress for about a month before my ex friends came to my work place and saw me there, a week later, all of my colleagues and even my employer had the video of my assault and before they could fire me, I did the honours and quit my job and after that… well, here we are. I decided if they were all going to label me as a whore for being raped, I’d use that to my advantage and make money out of my body, because my video had gone so viral, I had so many viewers when I first made my website and decided to live cam shows. Now, instead of being that whore that was drugged and assaulted at a college party, I’m a highly appreciated and loved cam girl who thrives off being half naked on the internet.

They love it and I love it.

‘Personal message request by user: Unknown.’

I sigh as I wipe my make up off and look over at my notifications on my laptop, changing into a big baggy hoodie and tying my long brown locks into a bun, I plop down on my bed and plant my laptop on my lap as I open the message by the mystery guy who seemed to be obsessed with me but the moment I open the message, my chest tightens with nausea as I read over the text that I received;

‘I am watching you.’

And when I look up at my camera, I see it blinking red. Smacking the laptop shut, I throw my laptop to the side and lay back down on my bed, pulling the blanket over me, I sink into the comfort of my mattress, sinking further into my pillow as I close my eyes and swiftly float away into my unconsciousness…